Saving Dean
by Doctor Sexy
Summary: AU Sam and Dean aren't related and they're in high school. They've been friends for years but are just starting to express their romantic feelings. Will Dean's issues ruin their budding relationship?
1. Chapter 1

Sam Singer was sitting next to Jessica Moore in English class waiting for Dean Winchester. Dean was almost always late, but Sam was still worried he wouldn't show up. Sam had called him last night, but Dean had barely spoke, limiting himself to one sentence answers. Sam was pretty sure that meant his friend was going into one of his angsty phases again, which meant there was a good chance he would skip class.

Mr. Bell was talking about Hamlet, but Sam wasn't paying attention. He used to be more concerned with grades than anything else, but now he was only concerned with Dean. Who he was with, what he was doing, if he was okay. It consumed a lot of Sam's time.

"I guess Dean's not showing up," Jessica whispered. "Is he being emo again?"

Just as she finished talking Dean walked in and took a seat next to Sam. He groaned and put a hand to his head. "I'm so hungover," he said to Sam.

"Being hungover isn't an excuse for being late, Mr. Winchester," Mr. Bell said. "Soon, I'm going to have to call your parents."

For half a second Dean looked genuinely scared, but then it disappeared. "My mom's dead and my dad doesn't give a shit." Dean was always saying stuff that no one else would be brave enough to say to a teacher. But of course he was so charming he could get away with it.

"That's enough Dean," Mr. Bell said. "I'm sorry about your mother but you can't keep interrupting the class like this. If it's okay with you we're going to start the class now."

"Fine with me," Dean said, putting a pair of sunglasses on and leaning back in his chair.

"Yep, he's being emo again," Sam whispered to Jess. She laughed.

"Look who's talking Mr. Sunshine," Dean said.

"Mr. Sunshine? That's weak, dude," Sam countered.

"Leave me alone it's nine in the morning and I'm dying here!"

"Dean! Sam! If I hear you talking once more and you'll both be kicked out of class," Mr. Bell said.

Dean was about to open his mouth, probably to comment on how that wasn't much of a threat, but Sam didn't want to be kicked out so he glared at Dean, who shut his trap.

At lunch, Sam sat with Dean, Jessica, Gabe, and Cas. Cas was a year older and sometimes thought he was too cool to hang out with his brother, but lately he had been pretty nice to Sam. Sometimes Jo sat at their table, and then Cas never would. Being seen with his brother was one thing, but his younger sister was too lame for him.

Dean sat next to Sam, resting his head on the table while everyone else ate. "I hate my life."

"You should eat something," Sam said.

"Don't mention food or I'll throw up on you."

"Eww," Jessica said. "Why are you so emo today?"

"Because my life is an empty black hole of meaninglessness," Dean said.

"Is he being serious?" Cas said to Sam, who just shrugged.

"Seriously though," Jessica said. "You always get into these depressed moods and never tell us why."

Dean shrugged. "That's because I'm mysterious and sexy." Jessica rolled her eyes. Cas shook his head.

"Ah, so you're not really depressed you're just trying to impress the ladies. Is it working Jess?" Gabe said. Jessica stuck her tongue out. "How about for you Sam?" He had an evil smile on his face. Did he know?

Sam hoped his face didn't turn red. He tried to think of how a normal person would react. "You're an idiot, Gabe."

Gabe's smile never faltered. "I guess it's just me falling for it then."

"Stop being a fag," Cas said.

Sam looked down at his lunch, avoiding eye contact. His brother was far from sensitive about anyone acting 'gay'. He wondered how Cas would react if he knew that his brother was gay.

"Okay, I'm just going to take a nap now," Dean said, laying his arms and head down on the table.

After school, Dean and Sam walked home together, as usual.

"So, are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Sam asked, not very hopefully.

Dean shrugged. "Just stuff."

"Your dad?"

Dean nodded a little. "I don't want to talk about it."

He never wanted to talk about it. Sam wasn't sure what went on with Dean and his dad, just that it wasn't very good. Every time Sam had seen Dean's dad, he was cold and silent, or worse downright cruel. Sam was pretty sure the two Winchesters got into fights all the time.

"You want to come hang out?" Sam asked.

Dean shook his head. "Come to my place, I'd rather it just be us."

Sam's heart skipped a beat. He was more than happy to agree to that. They headed to Dean's house and Dean turned the TV on to his favorite soap, Dr. Sexy M.D. Sam had never told anyone that he watched it, he was just happy that Dean had shared it with him. They sat in silence for a while, before Dean said, "Sam..."

"Yeah?"

Dean looked at him as if he wanted to say something, but he couldn't get the words out. "I..."

"Dean, I've known you for years, you can tell me anything," Sam said.

"No, I can't," Dean said.

Sam was a little hurt, that Dean didn't trust him enough to tell him things. Well, Dean did tell him things, just not _everything_. And Sam felt that there was one big thing that Dean was hiding. "Why can't you tell me?"

Tears started to form in Dean's eyes. "I want to Sam. You don't know how much I want to tell you. I just can't. It's better this way. Trust me."

Sam wanted to trust him, but what could be so bad that Dean couldn't tell him? Part of him wondered if maybe, just maybe it was the same secret that he was hiding. "Okay, I'm sorry." Tears were now streaming down Dean's face. "Hey... don't cry."

Dean wiped his tears away. Then he rested his head on Sam's shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"Hey..." Sam was feeling a rush of emotions. He felt happy that Dean was on his shoulder, and guilty for feeling that way. But mostly he felt a deep cutting heartache knowing how bad Dean was feeling.

Dean moved his head off Sam's shoulder. Then Sam grabbed his face and pulled it towards his, kissing him hard. For a moment he lingered, their lips touching each other. Then he stuck his tongue in Dean's mouth, and moved it around wildly savouring the moment in case it never happened again. Dean kissed him back with the same intensity. Both boys were holding on to the kiss for dear life.

They had kissed just once before. It was several months before. One night they were just talking and laughing, and Dean had just kissed him. It was just a quick peck on the lips, and then Dean had pretended it never happened. Sam spent months trying to analyze it, but he never did figure it out.

But this kiss, Sam could tell that Dean meant it. Sam was ready to take full advantage of this. He pinned Dean down on the couch, laying on top of him, kissing him harder. Dean was clawing hard at his back. Sam could hardly stand it anymore and reached for Dean's zipper.

"Hey," Dean said pulling away. "No." There were tears in his eyes again.

Sam immediately felt guilty. How had he got so carried away so fast? "I'm sorry... I-"

"-I think you should go."

"Dean, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I was being stupid," Sam said.

Dean was full on crying now, looking away. "Just go."

"Can I call you later to talk?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, okay," Dean said. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Sam said, feeling more confused than he ever had in his life. "How about you call me when you're ready to talk?"

"Okay," Dean said before slamming the door on Sam leaving him to wonder, _What the hell just happened_?


	2. Chapter 2

Sam waited all night, but Dean never called. He wasn't exactly surprised. Dean had reacted very, very badly. What Sam couldn't figure out was why he had kissed him back for so long, but started crying when he tried to go further. Okay, it was very quick and it was a bad idea, but it was a pretty strong reaction. He could have just said no.

The next day, Sam was dreading school. He couldn't imagine any scenario that didn't end horribly. But while he was eating breakfast Dean called.

"Want to walk to school with me?" Dean asked. Normally, they didn't walk together because Dean was always late and that bothered Sam.

"Yeah, sure," Sam said, both immensely relieved that Dean was talking to him and terrified of what he was going to say.

When Sam passed Dean's house, Dean was already outside waiting. "Hey."

"Hey," Sam said. "I'm sorry about yesterday."

"No, I'm sorry, I overreacted," Dean said as they started to walk to school.

"No, I shouldn't have done that, it was way too fast," Sam said.

Dean nodded. "You just kind of... caught me off guard."

"So... are we okay?" Sam asked.

"Sam... when you kissed me, was that just a one time thing?"

"Well, that's really up to you," Sam said.

Dean smiled. "So, want to be my boyfriend?"

"Why, yes," Sam said, a huge grin on his face. "Yes, I do."

Dean grabbed Sam's hand and they walked like that right into the school. Everyone stared and Sam couldn't help but feel terrified of how people would react.

Jessica came and ran up to them and squealed. "What is this?"

"What does it look like, genius?" Dean said.

"Don't be mean, Dean," Sam said, letting go of Dean's hand.

"Aww, why'd you let go? I wanted to make a scene," Dean whined.

"Yeah, well I think we already managed that," Sam said, self-conscious of everyone staring at them. Groups of people were laughing at them. Dean seemed unperturbed. Of course he didn't, he loved being controversial. He loved attention.

By the time lunch rolled around, the entire school knew about Sam and Dean. People were snickering and talking about them behind their backs, and giving them funny looks. A couple of girls came up to Dean to tell him just how cute they were together.

As Sam expected Cas didn't sit at their table, but Jo did. "It's about time," she commented on their relationship.

"I'm so mad at you Sam," Gabe said. "I wanted Dean all to myself."

"In your dreams, fairy boy," Dean said.

"Fairy boy? Are _you_ allowed to call _me_ that?" Gabe asked.

"I'll call you whatever I want," Dean said.

Sam was happy that his friends seemed to be taking it well, but he was really nervous about how Castiel would react. And would he tell their parents? Sam loved Ellen and Bobby but he wasn't sure he was quite ready for them to know yet.

Just as he was thinking this, Cas came bursting into the cafeteria. He looked absolutely furious. "Sam, I need to talk to you."

"Okay," Sam said nervously.

"In private."

Castiel half dragged Sam by the jacket out into the hallway. Once they were there, Cas waited a moment till the hallway was empty and slapped him hard across the face. "What the hell are you thinking?"

Sam raised a hand to his face. "Why the hell did you hit me?"

"You're dating Dean Winchester. Dean, fucking Winchester. You're dating a dude, Sam. I think I have a right to be a little upset," Cas said.

Sam was getting really angry now. He wanted to hit his brother back, but he knew that wasn't the answer. "What difference does it make?"

"Leviticus 20:13, If a man has sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They are to be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads," Cas said.

Sam didn't know what to say to that. Cas took the bible, very, very seriously. There wasn't going to be anything he could say that would persuade him. "First of all, we haven't had sex. And second of all, don't you think that view is a little archaic?"

"No, it's not. It's the right view. You're sick, Sam. You need to pray for forgiveness," Cas said.

"Cas the bible also says that anyone who works on a Sabbath should be put to death," Sam countered. "Don't you think maybe, just maybe, some stuff in the bible isn't right?"

Cas seemed to genuinely hesitate for a second. "It's not right, Sammy. You shouldn't be with a man, you should find a nice girl."

"I'm sorry you feel that way, but you can't change me," Sam said. "This is who I am, whether you like it or not."

Cas walked away, leaving Sam alone with a sore face, wondering if his relationship with his brother was forever ruined.

* * *

**A/N: A large portion of the idea for this story came to me in a dream. So if you're wondering why Cas is a douche, that would be why. I'm very sorry! Thanks for reading, and I hope you take the time to review. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

"Cas hates me," Sam said. He was shooting hoops with Dean in the park. He lined up to shoot, and the ball bounced against the rim of the basket and went flying to the left.

"I'm sure he doesn't hate you," Dean said, going to retrieve the ball. "He's just Cas... he's a little _thick-headed_."

"And by thick-headed you mean a douche-bag?" Sam asked.

"Exactly," Dean said with a wink. He sunk a basket.

Sam didn't go to get the ball. Instead he stared right into Dean's eyes. "He said we should both die."

Dean's face fell. "There's no way he really said that. You're exaggerating."

"He quoted scripture saying that gay people should be put to death," Sam replied. He grabbed the ball and took a shot, missing again.

"Wow, douche-bag doesn't even begin to cover that," Dean said, taking a shot and missing. "Maybe he's just shocked. Maybe he just needs time to calm down."

"He slapped me across the face," Sam said pointing to his cheek. Dean examined it.

"That asshole! I'm going to beat the shit out of him!" Dean said.

"Don't," Sam said. "Please don't. That would only make things worse. Besides, I don't need you to fight for me, I can take Cas."

Dean nodded. "He doesn't exactly seem the fighting type." Sam finally sunk a basket. "Want to go hang out at my place?"

* * *

Sam sat curled up in the leather recliner in Dean's room while Dean laid down at the floor staring at the ceiling.

"You know there is a bed in here," Sam said.

"What's wrong with the floor?" Dean asked. Sam didn't bother replying. "So... we're dating now. How about that?"

A small laugh escaped Sam. "Yeah, how about that?"

"Sam, this is weird," Dean said.

"It's not that weird," Sam said. "I mean I've been thinking about this for years."

"So have I," Dean said. "I guess I just thought it would be different."

"Dean, we've been together half a day I think it's a bit too early to be judging," Sam said. He felt like something was gnawing at his heart. They had been together for such a short period of time. Was Dean already doubting their relationship?

"Sammy, I don't know if I can do this," Dean said quietly.

Sam felt a surge of anger run through him. It wasn't fair. How could Dean ask him out and then revoke it so soon? "What do you mean you can't do this? Why did you even bother trying if you're going to give up already?"

"Sammy... I'm sorry. I just... I can't..." Dean could barely get the words out.

"Dean," Sam said. "Please don't do this. Let's just talk about this."

Dean just laid there, staring at the ceiling, silent.

"Please, Dean."

"Kiss me," Dean whispered. "Kiss me like you kissed me last night."

Sam lunged out of the recliner and on top of Dean. This kiss was everything. It was everything he had to prove to Dean, every emotion he kept pent up for all these years. Their lips crashed together and their tongues swayed in synchrony. One of Sam's hands cupped Dean's face, the other running through his hair. Dean held onto Sam's back for dear life and then he let go, all of a sudden pushing Sam off of him. For a long time they just sat there on the floor staring at each other and panting.

"Dean?"

Tears streamed down Dean's cheeks. "I can't do this, Sammy."

Sam had never been more angry in his entire life. Everything he had dreamed of had been given to him and taken from him in the process of ten hours. "Fine," he said, slamming the door to Dean's room behind him and running home.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry this chapter is so short! I thought about writing another section...but this was such a good place to leave it at. Special thanks to mb64, MaevaByB. samiam, cold kagome, and donny0252 for reviewing. :)**


	4. Chapter 4

Sam hardly slept at all that night. He stayed up wondering just what had happened with him and Dean. There was only one conclusion that Sam could think of that would make sense.

Dean wasn't gay.

Maybe Dean thought he wanted to be more than friends with Sam, but really he just wasn't into dudes. _Well, couldn't he have figured that out before asking me out? _Sam thought. Dean was sexually confused, but not anymore. He was done being confused. _Dean Winchester likes girls, not me._

Sam punched his pillow hard and rolled over but he knew that he had no chance of getting to sleep. There was a knock on his bedroom door. Sam got up and opened it. He expected it to be Jo, but it was Castiel. "Can I come in?"

Sam nodded his head and Castiel went and sat at the foot of Sam's bed. "I came to apologize."

"What for?" Sam asked. Cas had plenty to apologize for. Sam hoped it was about everything, not just about the slap in the face.

"For everything," Cas said earnestly. "I overreacted. I shouldn't have said those things."

"How about hitting me in the face?" Sam asked, pretending to be angry. But mostly he was just relieved his brother was apologizing.

Cas nodded. "Yes, that wasn't my brightest moment. But I changed my mind about you and Dean. If you like him, then that's good enough for me."

For a moment Sam had forgotten, but now he bursted into tears. "He dumped me!" Sam wrapped his arms around his brother, putting his head on Cas's shoulder and bawling his eyes out.

"There, there," Cas said awkwardly. "It's going to be okay."

"Cas, we were together for one stupid day, why did he even bother asking me out if he was going to dump me the same day?"

Cas patted Sam's back. "I don't know. Maybe it wasn't meant to be."

"Why weren't we meant to be?" Sam said, pulling away from the hug. "Cas, I love him so much."

Cas stared at Sam, his eyes wide. "Sam..."

"I just don't understand he pretended he liked me in the first place," Sam said, wiping his eyes.

"How do you know he was pretending?" Cas asked.

"Well, it's pretty obvious," Sam said. "I mean he dumped me only a few hours after we got together."

"How exactly did he dump you?" Cas asked.

"He said, Sam I don't think I can do this," Sam said. "Then I got upset... and then... He asked me to kiss him." Cas crinkled his nose. "And I did... and then he said, 'Sam I can't do this.'"

Cas stayed quiet for a minute. "Wow, you must be a really bad kisser." Sam punched him a good one in the shoulder. "I can't do this... what does that even mean?"

"I don't know," Sam said.

"It sounds... strange," Cas said. "Maybe he's just being... what's that word you and Jess use?"

"Emo," Sam said. "Yes, he was being very emo."

From the other room Bobby yelled, "Go to sleep you idjits, it's two in the morning!"

"Good night," Cas said.

"Night," Sam said and laid back down pondering the meaning of the words, 'I can't do this.'

* * *

The next day at school Sam was dreading seeing Dean. Dean didn't show up to English class.

"Where's Dean today?" Jessica asked.

"Why would I know?" Sam snapped at her.

"Don't be a jerk," she said. "I thought you might know since you two are inseparable."

"Not really," Sam said.

"Did something happen?" Jess asked.

Sam looked away. "Yes, something happened."

"Care to tell me what?"

"Dean and I have separated," Sam said, putting his hands together and then apart motioning separation.

"Already?" Jess whispered sadly.

Sam rested his face on his desk. "Yes, already. Thanks you're really making me feel better."

"Why, what happened?" she asked.

"I have no idea about either. Something about 'I can't do this,' whatever that means," Sam said.

"You know that I am going to need full details later, right?" Jess asked.

Sam just groaned. "I hate my life."

"Did you catch some sexually transmitted emo-ness?"

A couple of people in the class turned around to stare at Jessica. Sam gave her an evil death glare.

"I'll take that as a yes," Jess whispered into Sam's ear.

"There was no sex!" Sam hissed. Now the majority of the class was staring at him. Jessica couldn't help but giggle.

"I think it's time we start class," Mr. Bell said.

Sam and Jessica stayed quiet the rest of the class. Occasionally, she would shoot him a look, but Sam only responded with glares.

* * *

At lunch, Sam didn't know what to do. He didn't want to sit at the usual table. What if Dean was there? What if he wasn't? Sam didn't want to talk to anyone about Dean. Well, he kind of wanted to tell Jessica, but he couldn't stand the thought of talking to Gabe or Jo, or anyone else. And he didn't want to run into Dean, then everyone would know they were no longer together. And Sam hadn't exactly left on good terms the night before.

Sam decided to take his lunch outside and sit by a tree. He had sat there with Dean dozens of times before when the sun was shining and they were just friends, Sam secretly pining for him. Sam sighed and bit into a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He had put his headphones in so that no one would bother him.

Just inside the school, Dean and Jo were standing looking out at Sam. "I should go talk to him," Dean said.

"Like what? I'm sorry I'm a jackass?" Jo asked cynically.

"I was thinking I would open with that," Dean replied.

"It took you one day to screw this up," Jo said. "I can't believe you two are over already."

Dean sighed. "It's just complicated."

"You're an idiot," Jo said.

"I'm going to talk to him," Dean decided.

"You're only going to hurt him more," Jo said, accusingly.

Dean didn't listen, he walked out the door and over to Sam. "Sam?"

Sam took his headphones out. "What do you want?"

"To talk," Dean said sitting down next to him. "Is that okay?"

"What can you possibly have to say?" Sam asked.

"Lots of things," Dean said. "First of all I'm sorry."

"I don't care."

"Sammy..." Dean said.

"Don't call me that!" Sam snapped.

"Sam, I didn't want to hurt you," Dean said.

"Well, you did a fantastic job of that," Sam said. "You know what I want to know, Dean? Why did you even ask me out in the first place?"

At this point Dean was breathing very heavily, in a panicked sort of way. He took a minute to put his face between his hands and try to breathe slowly, but it didn't work very well. "Sam, I love you. I just can't."

"That's not fair," Sam said. "You can't say that. You can't dump me and pretend you love me. And you keep saying you can't do this, but you never tell me why. You don't tell me anything."

"What?" Dean asked. He was nearing a panic attack now, his breathing hitched.

"What do you mean what?" Sam asked angrily.

"Sammy, I didn't dump you."

* * *

**A/N: Sorry, this took a while, but I've been super busy. Fortunately I am now done with exams. Hope you guys liked this chapter, I had quite a bit of fun writing it. Especially the sexually transmitted emo-ness line. I dare you to try to drop that line in everyday conversation. :P Thanks for reading, please review. :D**


	5. Chapter 5

"Sammy, I never dumped you."

"What?" Sam asked, louder than he meant to. How did that make sense? He was entirely sure that Dean had broken up with him.

Dean couldn't respond. He had his head between his knees and was having a full fledged panic attack.

"Hey," Sam said. "It's okay. Take this." He handed Dean the paper bag his lunch was in. Dean took it and breathed into it and decided that wasn't helping and threw it on the ground.

"Just try to breathe slowly," Sam said, he patted Dean on the back gently. Dean obeyed, taking deep breathes that kept catching. "It's okay, just try to calm down. We'll talk about this, okay?"

Dean nodded his head. Sam put his arm around Dean's shoulder and kissed him on the cheek. "Sammy, I'm sorry..." Tears rolled down his cheek.

"Dean, I have no idea what's going on. When you calm down you're going to have to explain some stuff to me."

"Okay," Dean said, his breathing a little calmer now. He wiped the tears from his cheeks. "I... -I..."

"Hey, take your time," Sam said. "There's no rush."

"Sam... I have a secret," Dean said.

"...Do you want to tell me your secret?" Sam asked.

"I can't tell you here," Dean said looking back and forth. There were other kids walking around but no one was really close to them.

"Okay, will you tell me later?"

Dean nodded. "I'll tell you later. You have to make me tell you, no matter how scared I am."

"Okay..." Sam was dying to know what this secret could possibly be. But he didn't want to push Dean. He was beginning to realize how fragile Dean was, that any moment he could scare him away.

"Dean..." Sam stopped himself before he said it. He wanted to say, _I love you, _but that was too serious, too soon. "It's going to be okay."

* * *

It felt like forever to Sam, waiting for school to be over so that he could talk to Dean. Jessica had asked him what was going on, but Sam didn't bother answering. Even if he knew what was going on, it would be a violation of Dean's trust to tell Jess.

Eventually school was over and Sam and Dean walked to Dean's house together without saying a word. Sam was more than a little nervous, his heart pounding. When they got to the house, Dean led Sam up the stairs into his room and closed the door shut behind them, as if there was someone in the empty house who could be listening. They both sat on the floor with their backs leaning against the bed.

"So..." Sam started. "Can you tell me what's going on now?"

Dean stayed silent. His breathing was heavy again. Sam hoped he wasn't going to have another panic attack.

"Dean, whatever it is, you can tell me anything," Sam said. He reached out and grabbed Dean's hand.

"I know, I'm just scared of what you'll think of me," Dean said.

"Dean, I care about you a lot. It would have to take something really bad if I were to think any less of you," Sam said.

Dean bit his lip. "It is really bad," he whispered.

Sam wondered what it could possibly be. Was Dean a woman trapped in a man's body? Did he have two weeks to live? Had he killed someone?

"Please, just tell me," Sam said. "I promise I won't get upset."

"How can you know you won't get upset if you don't know what I'm going to say?" Dean asked.

Sam sighed. "Okay, I can't promise. But I'll try very hard. Besides, I'm supposed to make you tell me, no matter how scared you are."

Dean whispered something, so quietly that Sam couldn't make a word out. "What did you say?"

This time, he said it louder but it was still a low whisper. "I was raped."

"What?" Sam asked, much louder than he wanted to. "Dean, are you serious?" He immediately regretted asking that. Of course he was serious. Why would he joke about something like that?

Dean nodded his head and looked away.

"When? ...Who?" Sam asked.

"It was nobody, a stranger," Dean said. "When I was a kid. It's stupid, it shouldn't matter..."

"Dean..." Sam said. He wished he knew what to say. "I'm so sorry."

"It shouldn't still bother me. I should be able to be normal," Dean said.

"I think it's pretty normal to be affected by what happened to you," Sam said.

Dean was crying again. "After all these years, I'm still a mess. When you touch me... I..."

_Oh,_ Sam thought, finally realizing what was going on. Dean had been traumatized by what happened to him. Now he was terrified of being touched. _No wonder I scared him away_. Sam wanted to hug Dean, but would that just make things worse? "Dean... I'm sorry. I didn't know. I didn't realize."

"Sammy, last night I just got scared," Dean said. "I couldn't have sex with you. I just couldn't."

_I can't do this_, Sam thought. _That's what I can't do this meant_. "Dean, I wasn't trying to get you to have sex with me."

"You weren't?" Dean asked. He looked up at Sam with big, wet eyes. Sam wanted to get lost in how beautiful he was, but this wasn't the time.

"No," Sam said. "And Dean, I won't ever ask you to do something you're not comfortable with."

Dean buried his face in Sam's shoulder sobbing. Sam stroked his hair gently. "It's going to be okay."

"Sammy..." Dean moved his face so that he could look at Sam's face. "I love you."

Sam's heart felt like it was going to explode. "I love you, too, Dean." He decided to take a chance, to kiss Dean again. This time it was a sweet peck on the lips.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry it took so long to reveal Dean's secret. I know some of you were waiting impatiently! Special thanks to MaevaByB and mb64 for reviewing the last chapter! Hope you guys liked this. :)**


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